no, it's not scary

I thought this was my lucky Halloween year. Now that Courtney Love is a total psycho mess AND fat, I'm in business. But I could not be bothered to get a wig.

I don't even like Halloween, but I always feel like a party pooper for not wanting to dress up. Without the wig, what could I be? "Nothing" would be my usual answer, but this year the bar next door was having its annual party, which was doubling as its final stand.

Yes, it's closed now. For good. Crazy, right?

Anyway, I went as The Party's Over, which was basically me in my superfine outfit from last weekend, eye makeup down my face, shoes in hand, confetti in hair, one earring missing, etc. Very subtle, perhaps, but very appropriate, nonetheless. Courtney Love would have been fun though. Ah well.

For your Halloween pleasure, you can revisit the greatness of last year's pumpkin. And, why not read James St. James' tale of terror? The magic bonus is that Colorado gets called out as the seat of all evil. Awesome.

PS OoOOOhhhhhHHHhhhh! Now that is scary.

So's this.

Now imagine them dancing together. Sorry, that's just too scary.

but I'm not laughing

I currently work in an office where people talk about the best Tortoise show they went to. I mean, really.

Work was thoroughly ass, and then it took me 76 hours to get home. I would punch everything ever, but tonight my nice friends come over and come home and make me birthday dinner of steak and raclette. Days of butt get good. And maybe tomorrow will be better.

i don't need no cure

Today at Whole Foods (oh man, remember when I used to laugh at people with Whole Foods bags, because they were 50 times more likely to be obnoxious on the train that people without Whole Foods bags? Well, then they made one in Union Square. PS Wait until the Palladium becomes a Trader Joes. I'll have to stop spitting in front of it every time I pass by. What a sellout.) I saw that guy who is in like every commercial on TV right now. He was Andy Roddick's mojo and now he's selling cell phone service, I believe. Anyway, yeah. That was pretty boring. But yesterday, in Times Square, I screamed when I saw Beanie Sigel. Oh, Beanie. Album of the year.

See, it's just like Gawker stalker, but with the names spelled right. PS I know which Wilson's which!

Speaking of Wilsons, I finally give up OW in favor of Double V, and that bitch Jennifer Aniston now has to pretend she's going out with him? Come on. Don't hate on 1975 just because 1975 hated on you.

Speaking of 1975, I had a birthday on Sunday, and it made me 30. So far I love it, though I seem to still have a hangover. Unless it is the flu. I hope it is a hangover. People came from far and wide to celebrate with me. There was dancing and fun and drinks with crazy names (they let me make them up myself!) and more presents than anyone has any right to get. What a lucky duck.

i feel like hell, you feel like dancing

Since I've been gone:

• You can breathe for the first time.


• I went to London, saw Ewan McGregor thisclose (not as close as when we were best friends that one time at a movie premiere, but close enough), shopped a lot, visited Wimbledon (it was Dollie's birthday), saw "Pride and Prejudice" (I was too tired to stand anymore) and had big big fun, even fish and chips in paper. And Pimms! Then I came home.


• I got a Sidekick! II, son. Now to fill it with topless photos of my friends.


• I found this (warning, .MOV, but totally safe for work or whatever), which is maybe everywhere and very uncool but I love it a lot.


• Our party was announced.

And some other stuff. Who can remember it all?

I should be a better updater. You deserve a better updater!!