I can't stand up anymore

So I passed out last night. Twice. I have been dizzy and dropped. I've felt faint and swooned. But I have never ever ever gone down like this.

I'm in the bathroom, after a bath, when the Gay Pimp podcast begins to sound very far away, then underwater. Then I start seeing spots, then blurry spots, then I wake up on the floor. No memory of falling, no recollection of impact. My head hurts, I'm lying on the bathmat, and I don't know how much time has passed.

I feel like my head is asleep, the way that one's foot falls asleep. So I try to shake it off, then I try to stand it off. I'm successfully standing it off by holding on to the towel bar and praying for a clear head and then I wake up in the bathtub. And I went down fighting, apparently. The towel bar is bent and on the floor and everything that was on the side of the tub is on top of me.

Now I'm terrified. I crawl out of the tub, sit up next to the sink and hear Dollie coming in the front door. "I'll just be a minute!" I yell out. But it took me more like 15 to manage to put some clothes on and stand up.

I was in a state and had no idea what to do. And then I went to my #1 medical advisor, Google, and learned that if you don't remember fainting, you fainted. Also, that fainting is often caused by not eating (I meant to, but I couldn't decide what I wanted), not getting enough sleep (two hockey games in a row), working out without proper energy reserves (hey, those triceps are not going to tone themselves), and a sudden change in blood pressure (that hot bath couldn't have helped).

Once it made sense, I felt so much better. But my head's still a little swimmy today, and I was spooked enough to go out of my way to get some breakfast this morning. Let's just hope I can stay vertical from here on out. If I faint at work, I will die of embarrassment. I'm sure of it.